SO FAR YET SO CLOSE...

Hey fam! It feels so good to write after not having the chance to for a while. Semesters are coming to a close so girls are getting more occupied by the minute...
So before I write today, I want to shout out to my girl, Lush...was on her blog some minutes ago and it is some good stuff. So check it out..colourherlush.wordpress.com.
Now to the business...
Do you have those days when you just feel disconnected? When you pray and you feel your prayers are just hitting the roof and bouncing back? Are there days when you just doubt everything? Or days when the hardness of life knocks you off your feet and you feel you cannot get up because you are too tired? Let's not forget the days when you just feel nothing...
Everybody feels this. Those down days... we all got 'em.
Years ago in secondary school, I had one of these days...more like a period. And I had tried to study my bible and pray and worship but just wasn't 'feeling' it. That got me feeling worse... God felt far, too far. I started to think of what I did wrong that day that caused me to feel such distance or feel so inadequate.
And trust me, there is always gonna be a fault with you as long as you are searching for it. But after that didn't solve it. So I went out of my hostel for a walk and ran into a friend who was older and in a higher class than me. We got talking and he probed to know why I was looking so glum. I told him. And he said, "Dew, it is the times you feel God is very far that he is the closest to you". I didn't understand. He tried to explain but I still didn't get it. Not until recently...
 You see, you can never know how bright a light shines until it's really dark. So it's like this; for you to appreciate the light it needs to be dark... the darker it is, the brighter the light. We would never really need anything or anyone if we were adequte in ourselves.. we would never need to depend on anyone in any way if we could satisfy our every need ourselves. There wouldn't be a need for God if we could be okay just by ourselves... Get the picture???
So the more the need and hunger for God, the more of God we get. Now I understand why Paul in 2 corinthians(paraphrasing now) said he was comfortable with weakness. Because the weaker I am, the stronger he becomes. The less of myself, the more of him. The lesser time we spend focusing on our works, the more we can rely on what he has already accomplished for us.
So next time you feel too weak to get up, remember it's a good thing because now you can ask for his grace and strength which is readily available to you. It will pick you up and keep you standing. I told a friend some days ago that if we don't pass through some thorny bushes on our way to greatness, the testimony will not be extraordinary when we are telling it. If Moses had just gone to Pharoh and said let my people go and Pharoh just said, 'ok..you all can leave'. I don't know if the story will be worth telling. We would not have seen God's greatness. In fact, we would have found some logical explanation for why he let them go so easy...
Next time, your life does not make sense on it's own..smile because you know it's bout to shock everyone around you!

Forgiven and Forgiving...
It's Good Friday again! A time to reflect and remember the sacrifice of Christ (that is if you never do it at another time). So many excuses not to right? "The world is constantly on the move and we got to move with it. Besides we are much too busy to just sit and think upon anything except the bills and how to meet deadlines...." No Jesus, no you! Bottom line you shouldn't wait for Easter or Christmas to think about Jesus.
Anyway, the Easter story is all about forgiveness, love and grace. John 3:16, the verse we were all taught as kids and we can say off the top of our heads...says,For God so LOVED the world that he sent his only begotten son,  that whosoever believes in him shall not perish but have ETERNAL LIFE. This is what Easter is about...God loves us so much that he made sure we were made free from all guilt and  gave us life. Way before this, there were laws that said, 'hey! You sinned you have to be punished. Blood must be shed for your freedom.' And get this, it was only temporary freedom. So constantly the priests would make sacrifices for the people's freedom. But Jesus paid the ultimate price, he shed his own blood! And it bought us permanent freedom...God forgave us long before we sinned and made it that as long as we accepted Christ's sacrifice we wouldn't be guilty anymore... so you see, love, forgiveness and grace. We didn't even have to ask he just did it. He died and rose again  for me and you so we can have a kind of life that can't be taken from us.
Can you live like this? I am not saying die for anyone because that slot was taken thousands of years ago.  I mean can you love unconditionally? Whether it is deserved or not? Can you forgive? Whether you get an Apology or not? Whether you keep getting hurt? Can you forgive and let it go totally? In recent times I have been tested in this aspect...and well, I didn't handle it so well. Look, it is human to want to get back or hate or give em a taste of their own evil....but it is Christ to forgive. We get hurt all the time by the least people we expect it from...This is life. But think of how messed up most of our lives get sometimes...think of some of the really crazy stuff you have done and yet big or small sin you got forgiven  before your great great great great great( you get the idea) father was even conceived as an idea in any human' s mind. So I don't think if you were given a 1000 years  to live you would get hurt as much as God does. Truely forgiving is hard but is right and possible. I used to think I could forgive anything till recently...when I figured that my human will could only take me thus far and only the God in me could do that. So yes when you have Christ you can and should forgive anything. You can love the right way from your inside unconditionally...
#KSOM#GoodFriday#Easter